Life-Changing Lessons From 50 Books in 3 Months

12 min readJan 25, 2021

Learn! Learn! Learn! Says the Richest Man in Babylon. And so following that old and tested advice, I took it upon myself to read 50 books in 3 months.

Why 50 Books?

Like many people, I was drifting through life before I started the challenge. I was lazy, disorganized, and without a plan for the coming 5 years. More worrisome was the conviction I had things figured out. I knew I could do better, but was not convinced by any of it. My life plan was after all simple: just make it through the day.

It’s stupid I know.

By this time, I had completed a manuscript I was working on and I always thought that because of it, I had some kind of insurance to do whatever I wanted. I’m sure there are people who see their family wealth or jobs in the same way and if you are one of them, surely you can relate.

What I’m am I trying to say? I had a template for failure right there.

Yes, there was the remote possibility that once converted to a book my manuscript would make me a fortune. But when you are caught up in a fantasy, your mind doesn’t really want to get rid of it.

Long story short, for a couple of years I was stuck in limbo or between the states of to do or not to do until the 50 books challenge got me out. For that, I’m most thankful enough and that’s why I want to share some of the lessons with you.

Now, I’m not going to share details of how I came upon this challenge as that is not important but I will share the life-changing lessons from this experience. I’m sure you will find them worthwhile.

To make the lessons as practical as possible, I have arranged them under beliefs followed by practices. Why beliefs first? Because we act based on our assessments and beliefs. It’s just like the saying from What a Man Thinketh by James Allen:

“Our acts are no wiser than our thoughts.” So, I think it is best to approach things that way.

Here we go:

1. Don’t Be Emotionally Invested In Outcomes You Cannot Control

The first lesson is on emotional management and for good reason. Without emotions, we cannot have the energy to act on our goals. It is therefore a little sad that we spend so much time on social media and create emotions we cannot act upon. We feel happiness, outrage, disgust, joy, and so on and have no outlet for any of them.

The consequence?

When it is time to feel outrage in our own lives, we have little of it left, and when it is time to celebrate our own happiness or the little things around us, we are often too emotionally spent to care.

This was a hard-hitting lesson for me because I was the type that would read the news and scroll through social media first thing in the morning. As you would expect, my days were filled with jumbled emotions and with nowhere to direct them. A racist incident in the US might rile me up, the war in Syria might trigger a sense of outrage and hopelessness, and the looming climate catastrophe might leave me feeling anxious. What this meant for my day was that I was always distracted by emotions that have nothing to do with my work or love life.

What’s more, scrolling through social media was a drain on my decision reserves as I was constantly deciding what to click on. This situation made it more likely for me to make bad decisions later in the day and if you have lived long enough, you know that it only takes a streak of poor decisions to ruin life for good. Luckily, I never got to that part and you also don’t have to.

Many of the books I read dealt with the issue of emotional management but what they won’t tell you is that to change your life in any other way, you must manage your emotions first. That is the part I had to figure out the hard way after failing to make any significant changes in my life for many years.

What worked for me was a set of practices that have left me feeling better and energized to work towards my goals. I’m sure they will help you too.

Practices for better emotional management:

Digital Minimalism

Digital minimalism as explained by Cal Newport in his book by the same name is more or less the art of limiting your exposure to social media, email alerts, and so on. The point of digital minimalism is to realize that there is nothing inherently wrong with social media or CNN, we need them but not as the first thing in the morning or the next thing every 30 minutes.

Newport offers several strategies on how to practice digital minimalism but what worked for me is the good old-timer. I now work in 30 minutes sessions followed by a one to two-minute break in which I reflect on what I have achieved within the time-frame. These 30 minutes are sacred and I allow no interruptions to interfere with my flow. My phone is locked away, email alerts are off and there is no social media to speak of.

I understand that this strategy might not work for you, so I’m going to recommend a handy tool that will help you monitor how many hours you spend on a particular task or webpage. If you get the numbers, you will instantly want to change your internet habits because if say you spend 90 minutes a day on social media, that’s 547 hours a year! Or 22 days. Crazy stuff. The tool I’m talking about is called Rescuetime.

Thought Management

Are you a believer or a quitter? The second aspect of emotional management has to do with how we manage our thoughts. If you are someone who frames your negative experiences in a positive way or one who sees obstacles as opportunities, you are likely to have a better day and life.

So I have learned to always ask the following questions from any negative experience: What can I learn from this experience? Are there opportunities within this tragedy? If my best friend was in a similar situation, what would I tell them to do?

Having a positive mindset has made my life better in every way and some of the books that I can recommend for you if you are dealing with negative thoughts are: How to Have a Good Day by Caroline Webb, The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwarz, and The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday.

2. Intelligence Is the Ability to Form Good Habits, To Take Advantage of Opportunities, to Plan, and Organize

Once you have successfully managed your emotions, you must proceed to decide what being intelligent means for you. Does it mean dying early from avoidable lifestyle diseases? Does it mean being poor for lack of planning, or does it mean being proactive and creating the life you want and you know is possible?

Many people think intelligence is a force of mind like the ability to calculate the digits of pi to some astronomical number. This is a terrible mindset and I was also guilty of thinking this way till I read some books among them the wonderful Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol S. Dweck.

Intelligence is the sum of the things we do and if you think about it, evolution doesn’t really care how intelligent you are. You’ve got to earn your survival by putting food on the table. It is by doing that humans become intelligent in the first place. So ask yourself: “Do my actions speak of my intelligence or do they speak volumes of my folly?”

Still not convinced that intelligence is the sum of our actions and not how well we score on an IQ test? The other day, some guy asked me what was wrong with his life despite the fact that he was a good performer at school. I pointed to a rock that was lying around and said, “for all we know, this rock could be the most intelligent being in the universe but if all it does is to just sit there, how will we ever tell?” The point is, you’ve got to work your brains out in the real world otherwise your fantasies are worthless.

Practices from this definition of intelligence:

Create intelligent and well thought out routines. How you spend your day is ultimately how you spend your life
Design a life plan. It is possible to plan for your life and the earlier you start the better
Learn as much as you can. Never assume that you know. You will be surprised by the amount of knowledge that’s out there
Become a doer. Doing is what counts. You might have the grandest of ideas on the planet but the idiot who implements his vision is infinitely better
Seek information that has practical value. Did gossip ever create a car or an airplane? You should know better

Some of the books that you might find interesting in this area include: Living Forward by Michael Hyatt and Dan Harkavy, The Procrastination Equation by Piers Steel, Designing Your Life by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans, and As a Man Thinketh by James Allen.

3. Life’s Greatest Outcome Is Your Legacy

The third belief is an answer to a question that we all have: “What should I do now that I’m here? The answer to this question is quite simple; life is all about impact. You exist to either make an impact or to just fade away. In fact, your very birth was a gamble that nature played in hopes that it would pay off when your long act (life) creates something of value, and trust me, we all want that.

As a young boy, I was deeply impressed by the likes of Shakespeare, Newton, Da Vinci, Archimedes, Einstein, and so on. My fascination with these historical figures, made me realize that the world I live in is a reflection of the thoughts and actions of these men. And so, I have long strived to do my bit and make the world a better place no matter how small my impact would be. I encourage you to do the same.

You might be wondering why it matters for you to strive towards creating a powerful legacy? It is because no matter what powers, riches, knowledge, or prowess you or anyone else possesses, all that any human can be is an example to others. Just like you say Michael Jordan was the greatest basketball of all time, so do you wish for something of your own. Thus, be that amazing dad, daughter, son, pastor, or lover. Impact other people’s lives positively so that they can think of you fondly.

Practices based on the belief that life’s greatest outcome is your legacy:

Focus on building something that has lasting value
Seek meaning in helping others
Create a platform to share your ideas otherwise, they are worthless

4. Time Is More Valuable Than Money. It Is The Only Thing of Value Really

The belief that time is more valuable than money comes as no surprise as almost everyone recognizes that time is the most valuable thing in the universe. But do we respect time enough to spend it where it matters? On family, friends, self-development, and on creating things of lasting value?

Sadly, most people spend their time pursuing things that are of no value to them making them live a life of regret and self-loathing.

I have since resolved to be wise in how I use my time. I want to have time for the right people, things, and pursuits so that when I look back, I will see a trail of good decision-making.

Practices for better time management:

Free your time as much as possible by delegating unimportant tasks to others
Monitor how you use your time
Save money for disruptions i.e. emergencies, recessions, and so on. Savings will guard against unwarranted intrusions on your time

5. Pain Is The One Constant

No matter what you do in life, you are always seeking pleasure and avoiding pain of some kind. The question then becomes what pain should you embrace and what should you avoid?

For example:

Most people find saving to be painful despite the fact that this is the right kind of pain. Other people dread going back to school although it is well established that school is great for career success.

The point is, you’ve got to think of your pain management system and see if it favors instant gratification and if it does stir it away from that ASAP. Why? Because as long as you know that you are always avoiding pain and seeking pleasure, you can be intelligent about it.

Practices for improved pleasure and pain management:

Create conditions to celebrate long-term achievements like taking your kid to college. It is worth all the alcohol in the world
Increase your tolerance to the right kind of pain. The pain of pushing through, the pain of learning new things, the pain that comes with taking a risk, and so on
Appreciate the struggles of other people. Everyone is dealing with some kind of pain and showing concern and kindness can go a long way in comforting them

If like to learn more about pain get yourself a copy of Everything Is Fucked by Mark Manson

6. Life Is A Canvas

I dare you to look outside your window right now or at the people and the things that surround you. Everything that you see is literally your creation. This means that all the choices that you've made in life led you to that exact point in time and space and that’s what makes your view (life) an artwork. The question is does it appeal to you or does it make you squirm?

The good thing about life is that it is an ongoing work of art. Some people are born in poverty but end up in palaces and others in halls of power all because they made the right choices.

The choice is really yours so ask yourself: “What do I want to see when I wake up? When I go to work? Or when I meet my friends?

Practices for creating a better life:

Make small but significant changes in your life. If you become 1% better every day you will be 37% better by the end of the year
Craft a vision for yourself and take the necessary steps towards achieving it

7. Family Matters Above All

This comes as no surprise as family is the one thing that will always be there for you no matter what. We often take this state of affairs for granted but we shouldn’t excuse family for any reason. It is my resolve to be a good son, father, husband, uncle, brother, and friend because that’s what really matters.

A lot can be said about being a good person but I’m sure that it all comes down to loving unconditionally. Mark Manson in his book Everything Is Fucked says that when love expecting nothing in return only then do we become adults.

Wrap Up

When people ask what I’m about I will refer them to this article. I will tell them the following:

That I don’t get emotionally invested in outcomes that are out of my control. This I will explain helps me focus and provides a template for managing my emotions
That I consider intelligence to be the outcome of our actions and not a force of mind. I will advise that It is better to be a dumb sheep than a wise tree
That I consider life’s greatest outcome to be our legacy. What we leave behind is what counts above all
That I find time to be more valuable than money and would like to spend my time profitably
That I know pain to the one constant. I will argue that we are always seeking pleasure and avoiding pain and that my goal is to accommodate the pain that’s worthwhile
That our choices create our present reality. So I do monitor my choices in an effort to make them better
And finally that family matters above all

Now that you know what I’m about, what will you say when someone asks what you are about?

The complete list of 50 books